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If a high-speed blip on your radar follows you taking turns wide and looks like a heat seating missile and there is a bloke/tiger with a heat seeking missile launcher behind you then you are being stalked by a secret familyguyquagmire'er.

Try talking to them and if they pretend they can hear you then run because your explosion is imminent and it is government policy to kill as little people as possible. (The exception being The Candyman who must kill at least a western hamlet every day or face losing his 5% discount on mangled nody parts at his own shop.

If you do end up pasted all over everywhere i suggest you pull yourslef together and idolise those made of sterner stuffing. Whilst contemplating the fact your one time innards are now wide spread outards and persuading death that a perfectly healthy fence is the dead one not you (whilst countering the fence's truthful convincing argument and evidence, you should travel to a volcano and hope Chloe makes class Prime minister.

If you heroically turn this situation right round like a record baby then you are a comeback queen regardless of your weight.

These are also following your shadow's sock puppet usernameEdit

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