The Machine that goes ping® is a very advanced machine which fires a large number of rubber bands. These rubber bands are attached to ultra-flexible nails which make a high-pitched sound due to release of tension from the rubber band. These are then returned through a conveyor belt, which then separates the rubber bands and then passes them to another conveyor belt. This conveyor belt then goes through a series of gates, which reattaches the rubber bands to their respective nails, and then the tension builds up again. The cycle takes approximately two minutes.
In Monty Python'''''s movie The Meaning Of Life, the Machine that goes ping® is featured as a machine that checks if some person's baby is still alive while in the womb. However, after Hindleyite broke into the UK Patent office, he had confirmed that this was not one of the functions. He was then charged and sent to life imprisonment, and is now writing articles for Uncyclopedia in his prison cell.
The Machine that goes ping® is patented by Monty Python Inc, under the UK patent number 1,2,5.